* Dyeing Experience *

I attempted to dye my hair myself just now.
Kind of succeeded and failed..
I succeeded in adding colors to my hair..
But it did not turn out as expected..
The color I used was light Auburn. It is kind of light but I thought it wouldn't be bright because of my dark hair..
Now my hair look like crap.. because of uneven application..
Sigh.. if I am pessimistic, my hair makes me look stupid..
If I am optimistic, I would say that I have discovered a new style of dyeing..
My hair is so weird!!
The roots are bright orangery brown but the ends are still black..
Worse, the color is super obvious where my hair parting is..
How to go out with this hair? (T-T)
i am who i am
4/30/2008 05:19:00 AM

* Did not sleep at all.. *

I did not sleep at all before the paper..
Tossed around in bed for more than an hour and I decided to give up trying to sleep.
Surprisingly, I did not sleep or feel sleepy at all during the paper..
But I came back and slept till 7pm..
My body clock is now so screwed that I worry for tomorrow's paper..
How am I suppose to sleep later?
And I haven't really studied for physical chem..

Die.. =X
i am who i am
4/28/2008 09:43:00 PM

* Exams again.. *

The 1st paper is in 5 hours.. and I am still awake.. sian.. every time like that one..
i am who i am
4/28/2008 03:53:00 AM

* Failure.. *

And I failed to stay awake..
I hope I can still sleep like normal people later..
i am who i am
4/25/2008 06:52:00 PM

* Sleeping Disorder *

Today, I am so going to overcome my sleeping problem.
I am going to stay awake as much as I can until at least 10pm tonight.
If not, I will continue to sleep in the day and stay wide awake at night.
And suffer the consequences during the exams.

Overview of my notes this semester:
Analytical notes are so thick.
Chinese notes make me sleepy.
Organic notes make my head spin.
Physical notes are useless.
And I don't care about the geography notes.
i am who i am
4/25/2008 07:50:00 AM

* Terrible Lag.. *

Sigh.. I'm now suffering from a terrible lag..
I have been sleeping more and more these days..
I wonder why..
Recently I have been sleeping at 8am and waking up at 4pm..
That's 8 hours of sleep!
That was considered a luxury during the past 7 months..
I should stop sleeping so much and start studying!
But I just cant help it.. The bed is just too tempting..
i am who i am
4/22/2008 05:55:00 PM

* The Decision *

I've finally made the decision after much thinking.. My answer is YES.
It's not because I want to save Rag.
It's because I feel that I cannot stand seeing an inexperience bunch of MEs without a leader.
I am afraid that during Rag, I will make too much comments about how the MEs work or 'help' them too much as a Director.
If that is going to happen, I would rather be CME than a director that helps too much.

i am who i am
4/22/2008 02:40:00 AM

* 1st Anniversary *

Yay!! I was so bored I started looking at my own blog and I found out that this blog is 1 year old already!! Haha.. 1 year of blogging already.. how fast time flies..

I should be studying la.. but look at what I'm doing now.. Sigh.. I got distracted so easily by people.. I am still quite disturbed about shout.. I want to comment but I dont want to invite more comments regarding what I post.. Now also need to think about whether I want to be CME or not.. SIGH.. My holiday plans! Earn $ or help Rag?!


i am who i am
4/17/2008 02:23:00 AM

* *

The question is here!!


What do I answer?

i am who i am
4/17/2008 02:07:00 AM

* Criticism *

They are so right!

Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't.

Eleanor Roosevelt
US diplomat & reformer (1884 - 1962)

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.

Dale Carnegie

If you are not criticized, you may not be doing much.

Donald H. Rumsfeld, Secretary of Defense
US Secretary of Defense (1932 - )

The above quotes are from QuotationsPage.com
i am who i am
4/16/2008 11:53:00 PM

* The smartest and dearest *

I will say that our dearest block head is the smartest indeed.
He can afford to have room allocation 2 days before his deadlines and presentations.
Other block heads are just a bit dumber so they cannot afford to do the same.
The other blocks are having their room allocation only this week.
That's why I say our dearest block head is so SMART!
He uses the fact that he had used his presentation on Friday to sort of blackmail you emotionally to make a quick decision because you feel so guilty for holding up so much of his time while he actually should be preparing for his presentation or finishing up his assignments.
It seems that other block had also some problems with their room allocation.
If all the blocks have it on the same week, then Hao Jie could have discuss and solve all the problems at one shot.
Whatever the case, I feel that the room allocation this year sucks! It does not follow a proper system and it is so flexible that people are manipulating the rules to get what they want.
I feel that the system should in this case be more rigid such that if you do not meet the requirements you can only suck thumb and move on with life.
Unless your neighbours are kind enough to give the chance to you, you can jolly well forget about it.
But I strongly doubt that it is going to happen in block b.
i am who i am
4/16/2008 11:09:00 PM

* Touched.. *

OH MY GOD!!

I'm so touched that somebody can actually write more than a thousand words in her blog about me! It was so nice of the person to bother writing so much. It's almost the length of an essay that I had to submit last year for my SS module. Wow, so expected from a FASS student. If it was me, I won't even bother writing more than a hundred. And the way the 'essay' was written, it was as if I was guaranteed to read it. It was an entry specially for me!

Well, I don't mind if the person has brought out the block fund issue during the rally. If it really happens, I would really want to know what the hall thinks about the collection of block funds. Do they really think that the block fund legal? What if it was made known to them that the block funds are illegal? Will most of the people still pay? What people don't know they usually don't care, so I think if they did, the blocks will all lose quite a bit of their income. Mind you that the JCRC actually allocated $8 per Shearite for block activities and amenities. Imagine that the blocks are like collecting $30 per semester?

Talking about 'barking', I really have to ask who are those who are really barking at my corridor every night around 3-4am like as if it was 7-8pm? And look who's "throwing your weight around"? Did I ever show my superiority when going about stuff in the block? Mind you that I didn't. And look at those people who keeps harping that because of my position so I am expected to attend events or participate in certain activities.

I can heck it and not be JCRC at all. Who wants to be JCRC anyway when people only know how to shoot (or "flame") others. Outside the block is like that, come back to the block also like that. How to tolerate all these nonsense? Is this what I will call my home away from home? If you think I am joining it for namesake, join it yourself and see how difficult it is to lose freedom to do many things. See how people link whatever you do or say to your position. Have a taste of what it's like your own before you comment on anything that links me to that position.
i am who i am
4/15/2008 02:10:00 AM

* Happy for my friend =) *

My good friend from Woodlands Ring Secondary and her boyfriend. Haven't kept in touch with her since we graduated from YJC.. Sigh.. I was kind of surprised when I saw this pic in both their friendster.. I never knew they were together.. haha.. So loving.. Benjamin is a senior from the pioneer batch (Lenny's batch or 2 batches before me). We played badminton together in secondary school.. I kind of regret not keeping in touch with my secondary school friends, especially those in badminton.. sigh.. those memories.. I feel so left out now.. And what am I doing now? Stuck in hall playing badminton with people where some of their skills can't even match up to my juniors when they entered in sec 1..

I actually didn't find this senior good-looking at all when I'm in secondary school.. Is it that he became more handsome or I had stamps on my eyes back then? Lol.. So happy for Soo Fen..
i am who i am
4/14/2008 12:30:00 AM

* Surviving Block B for the Dummies *

This is a survival guide for Dummies if they are so unfortunately stuck in block B.

1) Make friends with EVERYONE
Everyone includes those you don't like too. Be nice to people. Having another friend is better than having another enemy. If some people don't want to be friends, then find others to make friends with. If you cannot really find a friend out of this 100 people, look for friends outside the block then. Friends are really important in hall, they are your emotional support. If you really cannot even find one in the entire hall, then you must be the problem, reflect on yourself.

2) Accept the fact that cliques form in the block
Cliques form everywhere. Don't condemn the formation of cliques, it's human nature that people come together to act with others secretly to gain a desired end. But who says that cliques can only have negative connotations? Your desired end could be to survive hell in block B together, is that negative? So, create one or find one but still continue to make friends with the rest of the world. There is no stated rule that you cannot have friends outside of your own cliques. The more powerful cliques may swallow the weaker ones, so you should strengthen your clique to survive. It's a survival of the fittest.

3) Try to minimize conflicts
Find win-win solutions to solve conflicts. Make the place a better environment to live in by not creating any animosity within the block. Do not be stupid and be the only party that suffers, it is not fair to you, unless you want to be the saint and take the damages to yourself. Well, it's one solution to solving problems but don't be the hero all the time. Even heroes need a break, they are humans too.

4) Stay active at Hall level
Join activities (not sports only) and don't slack on the job. This is the only way to save your ass from being kicked out of hall. Earn more than enough points to stay so that you'll not need to beg others to let you stay after that. You might be forgotten or ignored if you belong to the minority of the block. Face it, the "powerful" people only fight hard for their friends, they might not even care about you. If you are not powerful at block level, try being powerful at hall level. Become captains, ICs, chairpersons or JCRC, show the "powerful" how powerful you are exactly. You get to make impacts and influence more people at hall level. When you have the power, you can help people you want to help.

In conclusion, you'll have to do things to save yourself. People won't come to save you if you don't even want to try to save yourself. This place is a cruel world. Good luck with surviving hell..

i am who i am
4/13/2008 03:13:00 AM

* Positive Sheares Experience *

Positive Sheares Experience.
The phrase that you keep hearing every now and then.
Frankly speaking, I had my best PSE in Rag and SECC.
I would even say I had my PSE from the touch rugby girls.
But I guess it is all that I have for this year, sadly.
How can I have PSE from being JCRC while getting shot at so very often?
This year is the year with the most politics that I have ever faced in my life so far.
I would have the maximum PSE I could ever had if I have not been such a busybody..
Join two sports.. Slack through the entire year.. Maybe pull up my CAP..
Have thousands of gossip sessions, talk about whatever I want without any restrictions..
These are what I'll call PSE!
Thanks to some groups of people in hall, I am not enjoying anymore PSE.
I don't understand how people can hold grudges for that long.
And on top of that keep finding ways to avenge for himself.
With all the hatred in mind, how can he be open to PSE?
Other than Hall politics.. I still have block politics..
How can I expect those little girls to be wolves in sheep' clothing?
Little bitches.. I'll remember your underhand methods as part of my NSE.. So thank you very much!
Why does it seem to me like we are public enemy now?
Like as if we were the ones at fault.
Sorry for disturbing your peaceful and harmonious Beekers family then!
And thanks for making us the evil villains in your latest blockbuster "Room Allocation".
I had never had my dose of PBBE (Positive Block B Experience) from the block at all, other than what I've got from B7P.
I hate this freaking place!!
The only thing that is worth remembering about this block is that I found B7P here.
The only thing that I can remember about this hall is that I spent my previous vacations doing Rag.
All the sweat and tears we had, I'll remember.

Sincerely,
"The demanding Queen who is not pretty but in fact pretty ugly"
i am who i am
4/11/2008 02:38:00 AM

* Time for change? *

Maybe it's time for change..
A better Sandra?
A hardworking Sandra?
A Sandra that never sleeps in class?
A Sandra that doesn't do last minute work?
A slimmer Sandra?
A homely Sandra?
A sexy Sandra?
Lol..
Time to sleep now..
i am who i am
4/07/2008 11:51:00 PM

* Lousy.. *

I have decide to keep this blog private.
There were some consequences because anyone can read it.
I thought an occasional entry wouldn't kill.
My recent blog entries were seen by my friend and it made her angry.
She thinks that I did not contribute to the project enough because I was doing other unrelated things.
But I don't think that 10mins is going to make a big difference.
Like as if I don't blog, I can churn out another few hundreds of words in 10mins.
But I think that most of she told me about me in that 30min conversation is true.
People who are not in hall just cannot see how much work/activities we have.
People who are not leaders cannot see what is happening up there.
Do I have to express descriptively every single little thing in detail what I have done and how I feel?
Is the inability to express one's feeling properly a sin?
Do I have to put on a remorseful face for the entire week to show the whole world that I am apologetic for what I have done?
It was due to awkwardness that I did not apologize straight in her face.
It was because I did not want people other than the affected few of us to know about the issue.
I felt that if I did not act normally, people will start to question what was happening between us.
Maybe I have shown my feelings in a wrong way such that she feels that I am indifferent towards the whole situation.
Who actually knows how guilty I feel deep down inside?
I was actually surprised that they still put my name down for the project that I have not contributed much for.
But I just told the prof the truth anyway. It just feel not right to get "benefits" that I do not deserve.
Because of hall, because of projects and because of studies, I feel the distance between us draws apart.
I am a jerk!
I am just not like her!
She thinks that I can easily drop all my hall stuff and focus just on the project.
The only thing she always tell me is to quit hall.
I am so tired of hearing that from her.
I just so happen that I am busy on both sides of my life.
And I haven't even bring my family into the picture yet!
Maybe I should really quit hall.
Ya. Maybe it will make more people happier.
Though I'm not too sure about whether it will help my studies or not.
But I don't really care about my studies already.
Like as if it will make any significant difference on my lousy CAP score.
It is all but just a piece of paper in the end.
Frankly speaking, I have not even thought of the future.
The future that I thought of when I was a kid is so not going to happen in this time and day.
"Find a nice husband, set up a family and live happily ever after."
This is never going to happen.
It might happen if I was born 20 years earlier though.
For now I feel aimless.
I'm just living from day to day.
I don't even know why I am studying in university.
Maybe because most people are doing the same and my parents say it's good to have a degree so that I can find a job easily.
Sigh.. I just hope that I can find someone who understands how I feel without me expressing it.
i am who i am
4/05/2008 01:11:00 PM

* *

i am who i am
4/04/2008 03:00:00 AM